Born Broken is the story of my struggle with alcoholism, and the different stages of my journey to recovery. It is the story of growing up in a poor white neighborhood called Okieville, with no way out and no hope for a better tomorrow. You will feel the wrenching pains and paralyzing fears of my childhood as I waited for heart surgery to be developed, hoping that one day I could live a normal life like other children. As you travel through this story with me, you will discover how alcohol took control of my life while I was still very young and vulnerable. Yes, most of my struggles stem from chronic alcohol abuse, a disorder that this story will expose for its true nature. It will reveal insights I gained during my climb back into the real world from this deadly disease. How God grasped my trembling hands one desperate night and summoned me out of the abyss that held me captive for so long, one day and one step at a time.
Born Broken is a story that comes out of an era when many believed we only gained from life what we earned, through self-will and strong determination. I view my world from a very different perspective than one in which I grew up. In the 1950’s and early 60’s there was a belief that if you worked hard enough, received at least a high school diploma, a strong willed individual could reach whatever goals they set their mind to. But I was to discover that insights weren’t any more than rearrangement of facts. Sometimes in life things happen for a reason, though that reason may not be apparent.
From the early moments of my birth, everything that happened in my life was inevitable. I needed to experience what I experienced the way that I did. Even though I didn’t know it at the time, there was a mission of self-discovery that needed to be accomplished at any cost. This self-discovery would eventually have a profound impact on my life, altering its direction many times.
This book will concentrate on lost directions, while chronicling my journey through alcoholism. Even though I will use a variety of simple analogies to illustrate my personal experiences, these are just whispers of the true reality of where I came from, shadows left behind after escaping the darkness, the complex moments of uncertainty and clarity that marked my path to recovery.
I pray that my story will impart a message of hope and courage to those still suffering from this sad disease. I hope that it mirrors the horrors of millions of like people, and shows how I was able to learn the truths that I can now share and write about candidly.
My hope is that my readers will experience a greater understanding of God’s Mercy and Grace, and their own capabilities. It doesn’t matter where you came from in life—where you are headed though is of the utmost importance. Inside this book you may come to recognize similarities to your own life, similarities that many alcoholics have endured over the years.
What makes this story so heart-felt is the fact that I have gained freedom from the obstacles that held me captive for most of my life. How I was able to leave behind problems that had previously shackled me. Agree with me or disagree with me, we should all pray that those who seek help may find God's Grace.
The world of alcoholism is a darkened abyss, waiting patiently to devour all those who dare to venture beyond its gates. As we listen to those cries of anguish and torment inside our troubled minds, our spirits stay troubled. Without a powerful merciful intervention, who knows what future those still lost inside must face?
Once, maybe even twice in a person's life, an opportunity appears that can brush against that person’s soul. It can alter what they were destined to become. It can make an impression on broken hearts and injured souls. These are the evidence, the Footprints that God leaves behind. I am one of those blessed individuals who have emerged Within God's Grace, to share His Merciful and Gracious message.